I wanted this month to be over and write an entry for August. I wanted to share something uplifting - perhaps a piece of good news or a new milestone. Except that I can’t think of any. I feel so tired and my back pains are killing me, hence the turmeric tea, the pain relief rub on my table, and some lo-fi version of Moonlight Densetsu to calm my senses. Oh and yeah, let me include the fairy LED lights on my mesh grid and the faint glowing lights of my keyboard, mouse, and headphones. My life’s looking bright, ain’t it?

I discovered the wonders of turmeric tea when my sister-in-law made some, back when our entire household got flu. Its earthy-sweet flavor made it up for its pungent smell, an aroma that I’ve learned to appreciate as it became the smell of relief and answered prayers, much like the smell of hug, companionship, and clarity with coffee. That cup of hot tea took away my body aches and I sweated like I went to the sauna which made me feel a whole lot better afterward. That experience made me think - is there a cup of tea that will fill the gaping hole in my soul? Or maybe a cup of tea that would take away all the people’s longing so we’re not sad anymore?

Ahh, a good material for a new book. 

Except that I am not writing anymore… or at least, I am not writing again yet. It’s hard when there’s a lot of things that I need to consider, and especially harder when I think about how my readers would feel about what I wrote. Will they get offended if I didn’t use a politically correct term when I really have no idea it existed to begin with? Do I have the time to scour Google in the name of political correctness? But maybe I’ll get motivated. I have a cute computer now which a dear friend assembled for me (oh, hello Patrick!) and it can edit videos and allows me to see Jung Yong Hwa’s pores when I watch his Alohwa series on vLive, not that he has visible ones. And yes, it’s pink, and I named her Usagi Jung.

Usagi didn’t happen on a whim. I loaned my old desktop to my brother and he eventually upgraded it and I agreed that I couldn’t take it back anymore. So what do I do now once I surrendered my company-issued laptop? Because yes, I quit my job. Yes, in the middle of a pandemic. No, it’s not that I am not grateful or anything. I will always be thankful for that job because it’s the answer to one of my prayers a long time ago. I love my job and did my best to make it work, but maybe I really didn’t give it all because in the end, I gave up. I got tired, mentally and emotionally and I wondered maybe if I talked about it sooner maybe I wouldn’t come up with this decision (and why do I sound like I am talking about relationships?).

So yeah, it’s been raining for weeks now, the weather is too gloomy, and I’ve been talking non-stop for days. I need to do handover trainings through video calls and it’s not easy. The only consolation I have is that Will is fun to talk to. Too bad we’re not going to be workmates since he’s replacing me but I am thankful for the little time we get to spend over the phone. One day when all of this is over, I’ll ask him to eat samgyup with me.

As I take the last sips of now the second cup of my lemon turmeric tea, I feel better. The back pain is still here but nothing that my pain relief rub cannot fix. My boss introduced it to me and I never allowed myself to go without it ever since. And maybe some sleep. Skip Kdrama because I need a good night sleep.

I don’t make lemonades when I get lemons. Sweet life cannot mask the pain. We need healing first. Then add the sweeteners. So I made lemon turmeric tea. 

xo

Captain Ri and Yoon Seri lied to all of us - freshly roasted coffee is not as delicious as they said it is. Roasted beans should be left to rest for up to 10 days at least to allow for its structure to form. Yes, structure. Coffee has structure and I've fully experienced this just recently after having claimed to be a coffee addict for several years now. Reading Megan Markle's The Tig, I'd say now I understand when she described the wine having arms and legs as she took a sip. Same for coffee. I took a sip and I was transported back to my Christmas mornings, when there're chocolates and chestnuts and oranges and the cool breeze is too gentle it was too difficult to get off my pajamas. Nostalgia. Pure childhood umami. 

My dislike towards dessert coffee a.k.a. Starbucks is somehow justified. Asking for a double tall hot caramel macchiato is cool-sounding, but if I'll be honest it's too sweet and didn't really give me comfort on days I need it the most. It only gave me the opportunity to spend more money than I have to, and be alone in a table for two and think about why life sucks sometimes as I listen to classic jazz. 

I suck at latte art

So, am I going to ditch my coffee maker and ground coffee beans? Probably not. I mean, my coffee maker is my solitary companion during the days when my quarantine situation was at its worst. But maybe I should look for whole-bean coffee, grind it myself, and help farmers up their livelihood. Talk about farm to cup process. Too special. Pretty friendly to Mother Earth too. Shopee and Lazada have lots to offer on v60 sets and I can feel my surrender one of these days. I need it to make a decent elixir for my hyperacidic Ultimate Crush lol

Because it's more than just coffee. It's even more than a hug. It's the pixie dust for humans.

you two broke my heart with this lie :(

There might be spoilers ahead.

It wasn't until I updated my Goodreads reading challenge that I realized it took me almost an entire month to finish reading this book. The Nakano Thrift Shop is a slow read, a book that I'd likely curl up with on a rainy Sunday afternoon, except it's dry season in the Philippines and there's hardly any rain. Anyway, if you are after the plot, there is none. It's a character-based story written from Hitomi's point of view, the girl that works behind the counter of the shop.